my must-do-this-or-life-stinks list (aka Five Fave Parenting Hacks)

I was going to keep this for tomorrow's "Five Faves" but I decided to go ahead and write it today while Theo is super happy and occupied with his bowl of leftover pho and the three other boys are happy with schoolwork and the baby is sleeping.  No guarantees that it will happen again tomorrow, so today's the day.  I'll probably cheat and still link up with Jenna tomorrow, though.    

I couldn't decide what to call this, so Parenting Hacks it is.  It's not really a list of TRUE life hacks, since I'm not repurposing something to make life easier.....but these five things are necessary in the Circus household.  Without them...I'm pretty sure I'd be curled up in the fetal position on the bathroom floor, bawling.

Too many words, not enough hacking.  

Sorry.

Let me fix that.

Hack #1:

Music.  Never underestimate the power of music.   We are huge Pandora fans here, and let me tell you, I've got that thing trained.  We have schoolwork music.  We have playtime music.  We have Advent music.  We have Lent music.  We have quiet time music.  We have dance party music.  We have "everyone's-a-grump-and-we-need-to-break-the-grumpies" music.     

Need a change in attitudes?   Change the station.  Play it loud.    Need to get the kids on task with whatever they need to be doing (quieting down to signal that it's time for the babies to nap?  Done.   Time to pull out the books and get cracking on schoolwork?  Done.  Time to be goofy and keep the baby out of Mommy's hair so she can make dinner?   Done - it's 80s dance party time).

This works for the car, too.   Once I figured out that classical music calms down the rascals in our tight-fitting car (I love it, but every seat is full and as the boys grow.....so do the fights over space or toys), I mandated that it was the only thing we were listening to on our long drives back and forth to gymnastics practice.    Drives are soooooo much nicer now!

Along those lines, my secret weapon in the car can be found online for free OR at any public library.  

Audiobooks.

God bless the person who first decided to read a book and record themselves doing so.   They have saved our road trips.

Hack #2:

Keep nap time going.  Long after naps are being taken.

So far, all of my boys have ended their napping routine at a different age - Joseph made it to kindergarten before giving up his afternoon naps.  Graham made it until age 4.  Nicholas started sleeping 12 hours at night and not napping anymore around age 3.  Theo's still going strong with naps at age 5.  We'll see how Ruthie does, but my guess is that she's going to move into the same "one nap a day" rhythm that everyone else has had pretty soon.    Eventually, she and Theo will be on the same napping schedule completely, and it will match up with the rhythm that I have guarded like a Mama Bear the past 10 years:  busy all morning, lunch time, quiet time.

Even the non-nappers recognize and respect the schedule:   schoolwork and playing all morning, lunch time, then it's "feet-off-the-floor" time.  I don't really care WHERE they do their FOTF time, but it has to happen.   Quiet time reading, writing, drawing, or puzzle or Lego building happens immediately after lunch.  (And yes, quiet time music is its own station on Pandora).   

I *need* that quiet time to recharge for the rest of the day, and we will guard it until the last kid leaves the Circus.   I think one of the reasons dinner time can get so chaotic and so many parents struggle with a "witching hour" just before bedtime is a complete abandonment of nap time.   I refuse to give it up!

Hack #3:

Never start a load of laundry that you won't be able to see through to the very end.  As in, folded and put away in the right drawers/closets.   If you don't have time to wash, dry, fold, and put away a load of laundry, don't start it until you do.    Following this philosophy has made a WORLD of difference in our home life, and honestly, our level of frustration.   Meaning.....the frustration with housework is WAAAYYY lower than it once was.  Sometimes I think I'll be able to see a load through to the end and life happens and I end up not getting to it, but those times are few and far between.    It's amazing - without that back up of laundry staring me in the face, I don't feel as incompetent as a mom and housewife.   I actually feel - most days - like I'm relatively equipped for this job I've found myself in!

Hack #4:

Again related to the previous hack....get rid of at least half of your kids' clothing.   You really don't need it.   Especially once you get up to having as many kids as we do, you're going to be doing laundry on a daily basis, anyway, so your kids will have those clothes back in their drawers in no time.    I've found that the perfect amount of clothing for my boys must include:  3 play shirts and 3 play pants.  5 pairs of underwear.  5 pairs of socks.  1 pair of church pants.  2 church shirts.  At least one hoodie (although my big boys get these often as "complimentary" at gymnastics meets, so we have more of these hanging in the closets).    They don't typically wear pajamas, but just sleep in boxers and tshirts, but we do always have one pair of pajamas per child in case they visit somewhere OR we have houseguests.    Ruthie has even less clothes - about 3 sleepers/pajamas, and probably 3-4 outfits, 2 pairs of tights, and a couple of pairs of socks.

Why only 5ish days' worth of clothes?   It's really simple:  they can start to dress themselves earlier - finding outfits isn't as overwhelming for little ones.    There's less clutter.   Things actually get worn until they're ready to be replaced by the next size, instead of brand new outfits going unworn before the child is too big to wear them.   Sorting laundry is easier, especially for those of us with the same gender all wearing about the same size - it's easier to call to mind a picture of which child wears which article of clothing if you see it worn more often.

And the number 1 reason to thin out closets until you only have 5 days worth of clothing?    

It's similar to making it easier for you to do the laundry:   because they wear the same clothes over and over again, the kids themselves recognize their clothing more easily and can FOLD AND PUT AWAY THE LAUNDRY FOR YOU.   

Hack #5:

Teach your children to cook.   Even if it's simple things, empowering them in the kitchen will make everyone's lives easier.   By 6, all of my kids can make a salad, peel and prep vegetables and fruit like carrots and apples, warm up and cut up their own frozen pancakes, and make their own instant oatmeal.     At 7, they start joining me in the kitchen and start learning how to scramble, fry, or hard boil eggs, cook noodles and sauce, or cook rice or quinoa.   At 8, they start learning how prepare meals out of this book.  (that book is, by far, our favourite "kid cookbook", because of the simple-to-read instructions, large photographs, and varied recipe options).  Teaching the kids to cook simple things may seem really overwhelming at first, but, let me tell you....it is game-changing as a parent.   Being able to ask Graham to go make some egg salad sandwiches, from start to finish, for lunch - and being able to trust that he can do it well - is a huge life saver when the baby is teething and only wants to be held by Mommy.   Seriously.  Game-changing parenting move.

*****

So, there they are.  My five fave parenting tips that were passed on to me and that I refuse to ignore.    

What are your must-do-parenting things?  Share on FB or in the comments below!

Lentil recipes, Hagia Sophia, and why every little boy needs gymnastics....

Howdy.  

Today was one of those days that seemed much longer than it really was.   We rushed through schoolwork to try and have a free afternoon, which we then spent sitting around and staring at each other while waiting for various contractors to show up at the house.   The first group did show up, which leads me to celebrate because THIS will be happening soon:

Why yes, that IS our indoor pool! 

The second appointment didn't show, so we sat around and watched a PBS NOVA episode about the Hagia Sophia, and called it bonus schoolwork.   That led to this in my dining room:

That was quickly followed by making dinner, with my little sidekick:

And during all of that, I finally connected the camera to the computer and found these gems:

Which led me to contemplate just what it was about gymnastics that I loved so much for our boys.   There are so  many things (the physical strength and learning how to control their muscles, their awesome coach who is a great role model for them, and the focus on sportsmanship (the judges do NOT take lightly to non-gentlemanly behaviour!)) that we love about the boys being in gymnastics, but honestly.....the thing  I think we love the most is this:

They might get to compete individually, but gymnastics really is the best of both an individual sport AND a team sport.  These boys (this is only half of the team - they were split up into two sessions at this meet, unfortunately) are taught from the very beginning that they are a team of gymnasts, not individual athletes.  They might not be passing balls to each other on a field, but they are very much competing as a team and supporting each other as a team.  I love that about this sport - they learn how to handle the stress of individual performances, but yet have an amazing support group holding them up.   It's an awesome dynamic.

It can get to be an expensive sport, but man, it is worth every penny to me when I see what these guys can do and how much they love each other.

But back to dinner.   We got dinner made, and the table was put back together, so I started moving plates of food onto the table to eat.

I came back into the kitchen and instantly knew that Theo had been there.  How did I know, you wonder?  Because of this:

It's like one of those Poltergeist movies or something around here.  ;)

But he also does this, so he can stick around forever and ever, amen.

Yes, friends, he cleans up after himself, too.  Love this kid.  

And because she's the only one not yet featured in today's post, here's a pretty Baby Girl:

Alright, I need to get rascals in bed, but don't you worry!  Here's tonight's recipe, courtesy of Mr Grahaminator!

Lentil Sloppy Joes

1 cup dry lentils (I usually use green, because they're the easiest to find around here)

2 cups vegetable broth

1 cup water

1 green pepper, diced

1/2 cup ketchup

1 tbsp yellow mustard

1 tbsp sugar

1 tbsp vinegar

Bring the broth and water to a boil in a medium saucepan.   Once it is boiling, add the lentils and cover.  Reduce heat and simmer until the lentils are tender (stir often and add water if it gets too dry).

Once the lentils are cooked, move them to a large frying pan, along with the green pepper.   There should be some water/broth mixture left in the lentils, but if not, add water to cover the bottom of the pot.   Simmer until the green pepper is tender.

Add the ketchup, mustard, sugar, and vinegar.   Continue to simmer, this time covered, for about 30 minutes, stirring occasionally.  You want the lentils to kind of fall apart and get "mushy."

Add ketchup, mustard, sugar, or vinegar, to taste.   These are the quantities that we used tonight, but you might have to adjust it to suit your family's preferences.

Serve warm, on buns.   Sweet potato fries are the perfect side dish with these sandwiches!

"More Nanny's" Butter Tarts

Back when Nicholas (now 6) was right around 18 months old, we were visiting my parents.   Growing up, we always called my maternal grandparents "Nanny" (Grandma) and "Poppy" (Grandpa), and we continued that tradition with our own circus clowns, calling my mom Nanny and my dad Poppy.   

There was a slight issue, though.....my maternal grandparents are still alive, and trying to explain which Nanny and which Poppy we were talking about was really confusing the circus clowns.  We needed a way to distinguish between generations of grandparents!

We tried "Great Nanny" and "Great Poppy".... but it didn't stick.

We tried "Nanny G" and "Poppy G".... but it didn't stick.

Nicholas, then 18 months, solved the problem for us during that visit to my parents.   I had been standing in the kitchen, with him on my hip,when my mom walked into the room. 

"Nanny!!" he exclaimed, happily.

Then MY Nanny (grandma) entered into the kitchen.

Nicholas paused, with a confused look on his face.   Then, his face lit up.

"MORE Nanny!!"  he cried!

......and that's what stuck.   "More Nanny" and "More Poppy" became the names that we called my grandparents, while "Nanny" and "Poppy" were reserved for my mom and dad.

******

Yesterday, we were stuck in the house during yet another snowstorm (we've gotten something like 37 inches of snow this week, with more predicted for tomorrow night and then again on Wednesday), and with a little boy who had a fever.    We made cookies.....and then Joseph begged to make his favourite dessert:  More Nanny's butter tarts.

Mike, who also loves butter tarts, jumped into the kitchen to help him make them.   Mike will *never* turn down an opportunity for butter tarts!

Since my copy of the recipe is hand-written and on index cards that have seen better days.....I thought I'd also blog about them, so that the recipe is a bit more accessible for future baking days.

Enjoy!

******

More Nanny's Butter Tarts

 For the pastry: 

6 cups flour

1 tsp salt

1 tsp baking powder

1 lb shortening

1 egg

1 tbsp vinegar

cold water

For the filling:

2 eggs

2 cups brown sugar

2 tbsp vinegar

1 tsp vanilla

1/2 cup butter, melted

1 and 1/3 cups currant, chopped raisins, dates, figs, or nutmeats

Step 1:  The Pastry Dough

Sift together the flour, salt, and baking powder.  Cut in the shortening.   Beat the egg in a small bowl, and then put it in a 1 cup measuring cup.  Add the vinegar and fill to the top with cold water.    Add this to the dry mixture, a little at a time (you probably won't need all of it), making a smooth dough as you mix in the water.

Step 2:  Cut up the raisins, if you're using them.

Step 3:  Make the filling.

Beat eggs only until the whites and yolks are well blended.  Beat in the sugar, then add the vinegar and the vanilla.   Stir in the melted butter and the fruit.

Step 4:  Line the muffin cups with pastry.

Spray your pan with cooking spray or grease it before using it.

We use a mini muffin pan (or a tart pan), because we like the smaller butter tarts.   You can make this in a regular muffin pan, too.    Since we have a little tart "press" tool (basically a wooden stick with balls on each end), we don't pre-cut the pastry.   Instead, we roll it into small balls and place that into the pan and smoosh (technical term) it down with the press tool.    If you don't have that, it's usually easiest to cut a small circle with a cookie cutter, drinking glass, or an empty, clean aluminum can, and then press that disk of dough into the muffin pan.

Step 5:  Fill the pastry shells.

Fill each pastry shell with the butter mixture, until the shell is 1/2 to 2/3 of the way full.

Step 6:  Bake!

Bake in a hot oven (450º) for the first 10 minutes, and then drop the temperature to moderate (350º) and bake 20-25 minutes, or until the filling is firm.  (This will just depend on how big of a butter tart you're trying to make!).

Then, let it cool and enjoy!

Graham's "Spicy" Veggies

Ingredients

1 tsp grated fresh ginger

2 garlic cloves, minced

1 tsp mild curry powder

1 medium onion, diced

3 bell peppers, any colour, diced

8 oz sliced mushrooms

2 potatoes, peeled and diced

2 heads worth of broccoli florets 

2 tsp garam masala

1/2 tsp ground coriander

2 cup chicken or veggie broth

2 tbsp honey

2 tbsp tomato paste

28 oz diced tomatoes

1 and 1/3 cup heavy cream

2 tbsp lemon juice

3 cups cooked rice (we like basmati)

Original recipe came from this book (which I HIGHLY recommend for your kids - we love it!), and then we tweaked it to make it less meat-heavy and a vegetarian option)

Step 1:

Prepare your veggies

Step 2:

Sautee your onion, garlic, and ginger in a little bit of water to keep from sticking, for about 5 minutes, or until the onion is translucent.

Step 3:

(not pictured)

Add your spices to the onion/garlic/ginger mixture, and cook until it becomes really fragrant, about 3to 5 minutes.

Step 4:

Add your veggies to the onion and spice mixture.

Step 5:

Add your broth, tomatoes, tomato paste, and honey to the veggies.   Dream of a larger pot for cooking for your family and resolve to shop online for one (and promptly forget while moving on to the next step of the recipe).   Cover and simmer until the veggies are tender.

Step 6:

Add in the cream and stir very carefully.  Simmer uncovered for about 10 more minutes, until it's thickened.

Step 7:

Stir in lemon juice, then serve immediately over rice.  Enjoy!